Queer Cafe

Modern Love by Matt Nathanson

It Takes a Lot of Courage to Be Your True Self

Happy People Dancing Around the World

Teach Me to Dance

Our Shared Humanity

Finding Common Ground in a Divided World

In a world marked by diversity—of cultures, beliefs, languages, and lifestyles—it is easy to focus on what sets us apart. Headlines often highlight conflict and division, feeding the illusion that we are irreconcilably different. But beneath these surface distinctions lies a truth that is both simple and profound: we are more alike than we are different. Our shared humanity, the common threads that bind us all, has the power to transcend borders, bridge gaps, and heal divides.

The Common Threads of Human Experience

At the core of every person is a desire for meaning, connection, safety, and love. Whether we are born in a bustling city or a quiet village, whether we speak English, Arabic, Swahili, or Mandarin, we all experience joy, sorrow, fear, and hope. We all begin life in vulnerability and rely on others to nurture and protect us. As we grow, we seek companionship, understanding, and a sense of purpose. We celebrate milestones, mourn losses, and dream of a future where life is a little better—not just for ourselves, but for those we care about.

This shared emotional landscape is not bound by geography or culture. A parent in Tokyo worries about their child’s future just as a parent in Nairobi or São Paulo does. A young person in Toronto may struggle with self-doubt in the same way a young person in Baghdad does. These emotions, needs, and aspirations are universal.

Is America a Christian Nation?

I'm Tired of...

Bill Maher: Who Are These Crazed Shooters?
Everybody Wants to Be Loved by Ingrid Michaelson

America: Not the Greatest Country in the World

Dear Evan Hanson: You Will Be Found

Bernie Sanders: Support Free Speech and Condemn Violence

Truly Brave: Sara Bareilles and Cyndi Lauper

Global Dancing: Favorite Dance Moves

Kissing Around the World

What Truly Matters

In the end, what matters most in life isn’t wealth, fame, or power. What endures are the relationships we build, the kindness we show, and the difference we make in each other’s lives. When people look back at their lives, they rarely cherish the material possessions they acquired. They remember the people who stood by them in difficult times, the moments of laughter shared with loved ones, and the acts of compassion that reminded them they weren’t alone.

Purpose and fulfillment often come not from what we accumulate, but from what we give. Listening deeply, helping someone in need, creating something beautiful, or simply being present—these are the moments that give life richness and meaning.

How We Can Get Along

If we are to thrive as a global community, we must learn to see the humanity in one another. This begins with empathy—the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. Empathy softens judgment and builds bridges of compassion. It allows us to look at a refugee not as a threat, but as a person seeking safety. It helps us see that someone who disagrees with us politically may still love their children, care about their community, and want the best for the world.

Getting along does not require uniformity of thought or belief. It requires respect, open-mindedness, and a willingness to listen. It requires us to replace fear with curiosity, to ask questions rather than assume answers, and to focus on what unites us rather than what divides us.

Education, storytelling, and cultural exchange can all play vital roles in this process. The more we learn about one another, the more we realize how much we share. Literature, music, film, and art allow us to step into others’ shoes and see the world through different eyes. These are not just tools of entertainment, but of understanding and connection.

True Colors by Cyndi Lauper

Something Wrong in the Village
Love Has No Labels

Warning From Gov JB Pritzker

Around the World: Favorite Dance Moves

Imagine by Pentatonix

What the World Needs Now is Love Sweet Love

Harry Belafonte: Earth Song

United: Playing for Change

People React to Being Called Beautiful

Happy People Dancing Around the World 2006

Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."
-Martin Luther King Jr.

Extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice. And moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue.
-Barry Goldwater

"There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to seek justice."
-Jack E.Smith

"Justice is truth in action."
-Benjamin Disraeli

Moving Forward Together

The challenges we face—climate change, inequality, conflict, and disease—are global in nature. They remind us that we are all part of a single, interconnected world. No nation or individual can solve these problems alone. Collaboration, rooted in mutual respect and shared goals, is our best path forward.

To build a better world, we must act with both heart and mind. We must see the stranger not as “other,” but as another version of ourselves. We must recognize that every act of kindness, however small, contributes to a more compassionate and inclusive world.

In the quiet spaces of our daily lives—in the way we greet a neighbor, support a colleague, or speak to a child—we have the power to reflect our shared humanity. And in doing so, we plant the seeds of peace, understanding, and hope.

Let us remember: we all bleed the same, laugh the same, cry the same. We are more than our differences. We are one human family.

Barack Obama: Reflections
Oh America

Happy People Dancing Around the World 2012

Your Life Sucks?

What Radicalized You?

Pink: Message to the President

Teach Me Your Favorite Dance Move 1

Rev Dr Howard-John Wesley: Which Christianity?

Love Thy Neighbor

Bernie Sanders: Support Free Speech and Condemn Violence

Lessons in Leadership

From Ted Lasso

“Every day is a chance to be better than we were the day before.”

-Ted Lasso

“There are two buttons I never like hitting, and that’s panic and snooze.”
-Ted Lasso

“For me, success is not about the wins and losses. It’s about making others better people, first and foremost.”
-Ted Lasso

“I think that you might be so sure a person is one thing, that sometimes you completely miss who they really are.”
-Ted Lasso

“Do you know what the opposite of love is? The opposite of love is indifference.”
-Ted Lasso

Here are Ted Lasso's leadership principles...

--Be sincere
--Stay teachable
--See good in others
--Happiness is a choice
--Winning is an attitude
--Have confidence in yourself
--Optimists take more chances
--Everyone differs from everyone else
--Courage is the willingness to attempt
--Vulnerability is a strength, not a weakness
--Doing the right thing is never the wrong thing
--Be curious, not judgmental
--Don't allow one bad deed define who you are

One Love: Playing for Change

All Around the World by John Batiste, Keb Mo, Taj Mahal

I Think You’re Beautiful: Social Experiment

Dance Diversity: Favorite Dance Moves

Bill Maher: Who Are These Crazed Shooters?

Are We Losing Our Shared Humanity?
Modern Love by Matt Nathanson

Leadership Philosophy

Meditations From Marcus Aurelius

Marcus Aurelius's leadership philosophy, as gleaned from his "Meditations," emphasizes self-control, understanding human nature, and acting with justice and compassion. Here are the key principles:

--Understand that people exist to help one another. Marcus believed in the interconnectedness of humanity and the importance of acting for the common good.
--Be mindful of others' humanity. Recognize that everyone is striving and making mistakes, and approach interactions with empathy and understanding.
--Realize that many mistakes are the result of ignorance. Avoid quick judgments and try to understand the motivations behind others' actions.
--Do not overly exalt yourself. Maintain humility and avoid arrogance, as true leadership lies in service, not dominance.
--Avoid quick judgments of others' actions. Instead, seek to understand the situation and the person's perspective before drawing conclusions.
--Recognize that others can hurt you only if you let them. Focus on your own actions and reactions, and don't allow external negativity to define you.
--Know that pessimism can easily overtake you. Be mindful of negative thoughts and emotions and work to maintain a positive outlook, even in the face of adversity.
--Practice kindness. Sincere kindness is a powerful tool for building relationships and resolving conflict.
--Do not expect bad people to exempt you from their destructive ways. Be prepared for challenges and don't allow the actions of others to derail your path.
--Lead by example. Aurelius emphasized the importance of demonstrating the qualities of a good leader through actions rather than just words.

Barack Obama: Reflections
Oh America

Warning From Gov JB Pritzker

Your Life Sucks?

Happy People Dancing Around the World 2016

What Radicalized You?

Pink: Message to the President

Rev Dr Howard-John Wesley: Which Christianity?

Love Thy Neighbor

Bernie Sanders: Support Free Speech and Condemn Violence

Teach Me Your Favorite Dance Move 2

Fundamental Connections and Universal Experiences

Focus on community, commonalty, and compassion...

“We are made for goodness. We are made for love. We are made for friendliness. We are made for togetherness. We are made for all of the beautiful things that you and I know. We are made to tell the world that there are no outsiders. All are welcome: black, white, red, yellow, rich, poor, educated, not educated, male, female, gay, straight, all, all, all. We all belong to this family, this human family, God’s family.”
-Desmond Tutu

"Our shared humanity" refers to the fundamental connections, universal experiences, values, and basic needs that unite all people, transcending individual differences and cultural backgrounds. Recognizing our shared humanity fosters compassion, empathy, and understanding, encouraging collective responsibility for building resilient and equitable communities by acknowledging our common struggles and aspirations, like the innate desire for connection, love, and belonging.

Universal Experiences: All humans experience core life events, including loss, stress, fear, joy, and the search for meaning and connection.

Common Needs: Everyone has fundamental needs for love, belonging, safety, respect, and purpose, regardless of their background.
Genetic Similarity: Scientifically, humans are remarkably alike, with approximately 99.9% of their DNA being the same, highlighting our deep biological connection despite visible differences.

Emotional and Psychological Similarities: People share similar hopes, dreams, and feelings, which form the basis for empathy and connection.

Happy People Dancing Around the World

Is America a Christian Nation?

I'm Tired of...

Everybody Wants to Be Loved by Ingrid Michaelson

America: Not the Greatest Country in the World

Dear Evan Hanson: You Will Be Found

Truly Brave: Sara Bareilles and Cyndi Lauper

Global Dancing: Favorite Dance Moves

Kissing Around the World

"Stop hiding what makes you different and learn to embrace every part of who you are!"

-Amanda Foust

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment."

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Just be yourself. Let people see the real, imperfect, flawed, quirky, weird, beautiful, magical person that you are."

-Mandy Hale

Why Recognizing Shared Humanity Matters

Fosters Compassion and Empathy: Understanding that others experience similar struggles, fears, and losses helps to build compassion and connect with others on a deeper level.

Promotes Community and Connection: It challenges us to see people not as strangers but as fellow humans living on the same planet, inspiring unity rather than division.

Drives Collective Action: Recognizing our interconnectedness is crucial for addressing complex global challenges, as individual actions impact the wider community.

Encourages Healing and Restoration: Acknowledging shared struggles and providing mutual support is key to navigating crises and fostering resilience in communities.

How to Cultivate a Sense of Shared Humanity

Practice Empathy: Actively listen to others' stories and try to understand their perspectives and experiences.

Focus on Commonalities: Seek out shared interests, values, and goals to build bridges between different groups and communities.

Embrace Curiosity: Learn about different traditions, backgrounds, and stories to appreciate both the differences and similarities among people.

Act with Kindness and Respect: Make a conscious effort to treat everyone with love and respect, looking past social status, class, and background.

Modern Love by Matt Nathanson

Bill Maher: Who Are These Crazed Shooters?

Happy People Dancing Around the World

Teach Me to Dance

Are We Losing Our Shared Humanity?

“No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin, or his background, or his religion. People's capacity to hate is a learned behavior. And if they can learn to hate, they can be taught to love.”
-Nelson Mandela

I spent ten years working as a humanitarian where the world burned the brightest. I have seen the worst things people can do. And I have seen the best. Sometimes both lived in the same man.

Today, we are living through the most fragile time since the Second World War. A hundred million displaced. Democracies under siege. Freedom shrinking. Fear spreading like wildfire. The ground beneath us feels less solid every day.

When the world feels unsafe, people look for simple answers. They divide the world into black and white, good and evil. They point fingers. They build walls. They look for scapegoats.

And when that happens, three things die first: We stop acknowledging suffering. We stop seeing the human in the other. Compassion is regarded as weakness. Without these, empathy fades. And without empathy, everything else crumbles.

Is America a Christian Nation?

I'm Tired of...

Everybody Wants to Be Loved by Ingrid Michaelson

America: Not the Greatest Country in the World

Dear Evan Hanson: You Will Be Found

Truly Brave: Sara Bareilles and Cyndi Lauper

Global Dancing: Favorite Dance Moves

Kissing Around the World

Warning From Gov JB Pritzker

"This world would be a whole lot better if we just made an effort to be less horrible to one another."
-Ellen Page

"We should indeed keep calm in the face of difference, and live our lives in a state of inclusion and wonder at the diversity of humanity."
-George Takei

Acknowledge Suffering

Pain knows no flag, no race, no faith. It crosses every line we draw. To acknowledge another’s suffering is not weakness. It is the highest act of strength. It says: “Your pain matters.” It says: “You are not invisible.”

When we see another’s suffering, we resist the forces that would reduce lives to numbers, labels, or headlines. We bring humanity back where fear had stolen it away. Every face has a story. Every heart carries its share of broken dreams. To acknowledge this is the beginning of compassion.

Move Beyond Empathy to Compassion

Empathy is feeling another’s pain. Compassion is taking action to heal it.

In Buddhism, compassion means not just recognizing suffering, but doing all we can to lift it — with love, with kindness, with patience. It means believing that no matter how lost someone seems, there is light inside them still.

I have sat across from men the world called monsters. To find peace, I had to see beyond their anger. To the hurt beneath it. To the human inside it.

Aggression is pain turned outward. Violence is often the scream of a heart too broken to speak. Compassion does not excuse harm. But it refuses to answer darkness with more darkness. In every human being — even the so-called worst — there is still a small flame waiting to be fed.

Compassion says: I will not hate you, even if you hate me... I will see your pain, even if you deny it yourself... I will believe in your humanity, even when you have forgotten it.

There is no darkness in this world — only the absence of light.

True Colors by Cyndi Lauper

Something Wrong in the Village
Love Has No Labels

Around the World: Favorite Dance Moves

Imagine by Pentatonix

What the World Needs Now is Love Sweet Love

Harry Belafonte: Earth Song

United: Playing for Change

People React to Being Called Beautiful

Happy People Dancing Around the World 2006

Resist Dehumanization

Dehumanization is how wars begin. It starts with a joke, a slur, a careless word. It ends with lives destroyed. The moment we strip someone of their humanity, violence becomes easier. And each time we do it, we lose part of ourselves. We must refuse the easy road of hate.

We must fight to remember: The person who disagrees with you is still a person. The refugee at the border is still your brother or sister. The wounded soldier is still someone’s child. When we protect the humanity of others, we protect our own.

Choose Humanity, Choose Compassion

Compassion is not a luxury. It is a survival skill. In a world rushing toward division, compassion is the only road back. It is not passive. It is not soft. It is hard and brave and costly.

Every day, you have a choice: To close your heart or open it. To protect your pride or reach out. To see differences or to see dignity.

Choose humanity. Choose compassion. Choose light.

One Love: Playing for Change

All Around the World by John Batiste, Keb Mo, Taj Mahal

I Think You’re Beautiful: Social Experiment

Dance Diversity: Favorite Dance Moves

Are We Losing Our Shared Humanity?
Modern Love by Matt Nathanson

"Real love cannot be silent in the face of injustice."
-Mel White

"We are a better, stronger nation for having advanced the cause of equality."
-Senator Tammy Baldwin

"We are all tied together in a single garment of destiny. I can never be what I ought to be until you are allowed to be what you ought to be."
-Martin Luther King Jr.

Practical Ways to Practice Compassion Every Day

--Listen deeply. Listen not to reply, but to understand. Give people space to tell their story without judgment.

--See beyond anger. When someone lashes out, pause. Ask: what pain might be behind this? What fear? What loss?

--Acknowledge suffering publicly and privately. Speak up when you see injustice. Comfort a friend who’s hurting. Don’t let silence hide pain.

--Refuse to dehumanize — even your enemies. In conversations, in jokes, in thoughts. Remember: they are human, just like you.

--Act with kindness, even when it costs you. Hold the door. Offer a smile. Defend someone vulnerable. Give forgiveness when it’s hard. Little steps. Small acts. They ripple farther than we ever see.

In the End...

We will never erase conflict. We will never erase difference. But we can choose not to erase each other.

Compassion is not naive. It is not weakness. It is the greatest strength we have left. Even in the darkest places, I have seen it spark. A word. A gesture. A hand reaching out. The smallest act of compassion can turn the tide. It can keep a heart from closing. It can save a life. It can save a soul. And if enough of us choose it, it can save the world.

[Source: Christoph von Toggenburg, Nov 2023]

Modern Love by Matt Nathanson

Bernie Sanders: Support Free Speech and Condemn Violence

Teach Me to Dance

Aspects of Compassion

Compassion is the feeling of deep concern and sympathy for another's suffering, coupled with a strong desire to help them. It's an active emotion, distinguished from empathy by the accompanying urge to take action to alleviate the suffering. The word itself originates from Latin, meaning "to suffer together".

Key aspects of compassion:

--Empathy plus action: While empathy is understanding another's feelings, compassion takes it a step further by prompting a desire to act and help.
--Desire to alleviate suffering: A central component of compassion is the motivational drive to reduce the pain, sorrow, or misfortune of others.
--Sensitivity to suffering: Compassion involves being sensitive to the emotional aspects of another person's pain.
--Universal application: You can feel compassion for people you know, as well as strangers.
--Part of human nature: For most people, compassion comes naturally, although it can also be nurtured and developed.

How compassion differs from related terms:

--Empathy: Feeling what another person is feeling.
--Sympathy: A feeling of pity or sorrow for someone else's misfortune, but not necessarily with a desire to act.
--Altruism: Disinterested or selfless concern for the well-being of others, often involving actions to help.

What is Compassion?
How to Have Compassion for Others No Matter What They Do
Compassionate Communication
TED Talk: The Selfish Goal of Compassion
Compassionate Leadership

Final Thoughts

"All young people, regardless of sexual orientation or identity, deserve a safe and supportive environment in which to achieve their full potential."
-Harvey Milk

"It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else’s life with perfection.”

-Bhagavad Gita

“Discovering the truth about ourselves is a lifetime’s work, but it’s worth the effort.”

-Fred Rogers

“You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.”

-Maya Angelou

"I like you as you are. Exactly and precisely. I think you turned out nicely. And I like you as you are."
-Fred Rogers

"Freedom means nothing, unless it means the freedom to be different."

-Marty Rubin

"If you are not personally free to be yourself in that most important of all human activities - the expression of love - then life itself loses its meaning."
-Harvey Milk

"When all Americans are treated as equal, no matter who they are or whom they love, we are all more free.”"
-US President Barack Obama

"We need, in every community, a group of angelic troublemakers. When an individual is protesting society's refusal to acknowledge his dignity as a human being, his very act of protest confers dignity on him."
-Bayard Rustin

"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."
-Martin Luther King Jr

"Extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice. And moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue."
-Barry Goldwater

True Colors by Cyndi Lauper

It Takes a Lot of Courage to Be Your True Self

Something Wrong in the Village
Love Has No Labels

Bernie Sanders: Support Free Speech and Condemn Violence

Around the World: Favorite Dance Moves

Imagine by Pentatonix

What the World Needs Now is Love Sweet Love

Harry Belafonte: Earth Song