Queer Cafe

Congresswoman Talks About Her Gender Non-Conforming Child

Things You Should Know About What It Means To Be Nonbinary

Advocate: Half of Gen Z Believes Gender Binary is Outdated
Celebrities Who Identify as Gender Fluid

Straight Happily Married Father Wears Skirt and High Heels in Public

TV Report: Gender Fluid Generation

Raising My Rainbow: Gender Nonconforming Kids

Young Boy's Dream of Being a Princess

Trans and Nonbinary People on Bodies, Desirability, and Revolutionizing Beauty

Ash Hardell Video Talk: Spectrums 1

GLAAD: Young People Explain What Non-Binary Means to Them

Survey: 5 Percent of Young Adults Identify as Trans or Nonbinary

Not a Boy, Not a Girl: Mae Martin Helped Me Realize That’s Okay

"I'm not a boy. I’m not even a girl. I’m like a failed version of both.”

-Mae Martin (Feel Good, 2020)

Mara Harris reflects on how Mae Martin helped them come to terms with their gender identity...

At around the age of 14, I started getting into comedy. I was watching shows like Live at the Apollo, and Mock the Week, scouring every bit of BBC iPlayer for a bit of stand up. Eventually I came across Live from the BBC, a show which had different comedians come in for each episode. One of those comedians was Mae Martin.

I cannot tell you how many times I have watched that set since the first time I saw it, seeing someone be open with their sexuality, and joking about it in ways that did not diminish it at all. Mae Martin just resonated with me in a way the comedians I had watched before had not. I was closeted, and still trying to figure things out, but seeing that set just helped me feel more at home in myself and with the world.

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When I was 18, Mae announced Feel Good, their semi-autobiographical, rom-com TV show. I was so excited, I watched all of the trailers, and waited in anticipation of the release. I’m pretty sure I watched it all in one day, and I loved every minute of it. It had such an honest portrayal of a lesbian relationship, of realizing your sexuality, and of addiction. Its characters were amazing, and utterly complex, having you laugh with them, and in support of them in one minute, but having you question and dislike their actions the next.

This first season of the show is where the quote that begins this piece is from. I remember hearing Mae say those words and thinking, ‘oh wow’. Mae managed to perfectly sum up a weird feeling I’d had my whole life, that I didn’t quite realize I had until that moment. It made me first aware of how I felt about my gender, and myself.

Mae formally came out as non-binary on Instagram in 2021. She posted some pictures in a binder, explaining about why and when they tend to wear binders, and stating that her pronouns are she/they. By then I had come out to my friends as non-binary, and changed my pronouns to they/them, so seeing the person that first got me thinking about their gender come out too was so heart-warming. Seeing that positive representation from someone I had been watching for years not only helped me realize who I was, but also inspired me to be more open and positive.

This Is What Nonbinary People Look Like

Gender Animatic

Nongirly: Gutsy, Goofy, Geeky, Gloriou

Non-Binary Child and Their Family Explore Identity

Respectful and Supportive: Understanding Non-Binary People

Girl in the Kinks Shirt by Matt Nathanson

The second season of Feel Good came out in June 2021, and I watched it all in one day too. Mae makes jokes in that season about the various types of people and/or things they felt like, rather than feeling like a woman. It was such a fun and original way of encapsulating the non-binary experience.

There’s a simple, but important, moment in the last episode in which George suggests to Mae that she should Google about being non-binary, and says: ‘You tell me the right words and I’ll use them.’ Considering stories about trans people are usually filled with pain, especially concerning their relationships, this was a very refreshing moment to watch.

Seeing someone accept their partner so simply for who they are helps show audiences that trans people can have wonderful and honest love, that trans people can grow in their relationships, and they will remain loved. All of that is so important.

I finally saw Mae perform for the first time later that year, on their tour for Sap, and it was everything I could have hoped for. I could not even tell you the excitement I felt when I spotted them from across the venue watching Jack Barry doing his opening act. The show was funny, honest, and relatable. It made both 19-year-old me, and 14-year-old me, so happy.

Now, I’ve started volunteering with Just Like Us, the LGBTQ young people’s charity, because I want to help other young people get to see the representation they need too. One of the first things I had to do as a volunteer was put together my story of growing up LGBTQ+, preparing to speak in schools and talk about the need for allyship.

I immediately knew which moments to include in my story, which included the times I had watched Mae growing up and the impact that having LGBTQ+ representation had on me, helping me to realize who I am. Being able to inspire other people with the things that inspired me is so rewarding, and something I am so lucky to do.

In short, thank you Mae Martin, for helping me realize that I’m not a boy. I’m not a girl. I am, in fact, a successful version of both.

[Source: Mara Harris, Ambassador, Just Like Us, January 2022]

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Advice From Gender Therapist: Am I Really Genderqueer or Something Else?

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Trevor Project/Daniel Radcliffe: Discussion with Trans and Nonbinary Youth

Video Report: Back to School for Non-Binary Youth

American Passports Will Now Have Third Gender Option

Nonbinary, intersex and gender-nonconforming Americans will be able to choose a gender option other than “male” or “female” when applying for a US passport, the State Department announced in June 2021. Passport applicants will be able to self-select their gender without providing supporting medical documentation.

The policy change is part of the department’s effort to take “further steps toward ensuring the fair treatment of LGBTQ US citizens, regardless of their gender or sex,” Secretary of State Antony Blinken said.

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Them: US State Dept Allows X Gender Markers on Passports

NPR: US Adds Third Gender Option On Passports

It is not yet known when the third gender marker, reportedly to be an “X,” will be available. Blinken said the department is currently “evaluating the best approach to achieve this goal” and noted that adding a gender option “is technologically complex and will take time.”

Once the US has a third gender option in place, it will join a growing number of countries with such a passport option, including Australia, Canada, Germany, India, Nepal and New Zealand.

In the more immediate term, US passport applicants will be able to self-select their gender and will no longer be required to provide medical documentation if their gender identity does not match the gender marker on their other identity documents.

The Human Rights Campaign, the country’s largest LGBTQ advocacy group, applauded the upcoming policy changes, saying they will “decrease the risk of discrimination, harassment, and violence for an already vulnerable group.”

“This is an important step towards achieving meaningful progress for LGBTQ equality in America, and will empower and enable millions of citizens to travel domestically and internationally with greater confidence that the United States recognizes their gender identity,” HRC President Alphonso David said in a statement. He also called for the US to “encourage other nations to adopt inclusive policies that support non-binary and transgender people.”

[Source: Brooke Sopelsa, NBC News, June 2021]

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Androgynous: Joan Jett, Miley Cyrus, Laura Jane Grace

Ally Guide for Trans and Non-Binary Youth

Pink Accepts MTV Vanguard Award 2017

Different: Joan Jett and Miley Cyrus

Beyond the Binary

Respectful and Supportive: Understanding Non-Binary People

Mexico Issues its First Non-Binary Passport

Gender Non-Conformity

"I'm not a woman. I'm not a man."
-Prince (1984)

Gender conformity can be defined most simply as behavior and appearance that conforms to the social expectations for one’s gender. So, gender conforming women behave and appear in ways that are considered feminine. Gender conforming men behave and appear in ways that are considered masculine.

Gender non-conformity, then, is behaving and appearing in ways that are considered atypical for one’s gender. Sometimes "GNC" is used as a shorthand. "Gender nonconforming" was among the 56 genders made available on Facebook in 2014.

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Disneyland and Disney World Begin Using Gender Neutral Language

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What does it mean to be gender non-conforming? Childhood gender nonconformity (CGN) is a phenomenon in which prepubescent children do not conform to expected gender-related sociological or psychological patterns, or identify with the opposite sex/gender.

What does it mean to be gender fluid? Gender fluid is a gender identity which refers to a gender which varies over time. A gender fluid person may at any time identify as male, female, neutrois, or any other non-binary identity, or some combination of identities. Their gender can also vary at random or vary in response to different circumstances.

What is gender questioning? The questioning of one's gender, sexual identity, sexual orientation, or all three is a process of exploration by people who may be unsure, still exploring, and concerned about applying a social label to themselves for various reasons.

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Cory Booker's Non-Binary "Niephew"

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CBS News: Gender/The Space Between

Non-Binary Documentary: They/Them

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Ash and Ari: Non-Binary vs Androgyny

Nongirly: Gutsy, Goofy, Geeky, Glorious
Gender Animatic

Understanding Non-Binary and Gender-Fluid Identities

In recent years, discussions around gender have expanded beyond traditional binary notions, leading to increased awareness and acceptance of non-binary and gender-fluid identities. Being non-binary or gender-fluid means rejecting the idea that gender is strictly limited to being either male or female, instead embracing a spectrum of identities that transcend conventional categorizations.

Non-binary individuals do not exclusively identify as either male or female. They may experience a sense of gender that is fluid, neutral, or outside the binary altogether. Gender fluidity, on the other hand, refers to a dynamic experience of gender identity, where an individual's sense of self may fluctuate over time. Both non-binary and gender-fluid identities challenge the notion that gender is fixed and immutable.

For many non-binary and gender-fluid people, self-discovery and self-acceptance are ongoing journeys. Society's rigid gender norms can often lead to confusion, isolation, and discrimination. However, as conversations around gender diversity continue to evolve, there is growing recognition of the validity and importance of these identities.

One of the key aspects of being non-binary or gender-fluid is the freedom to express oneself authentically. This may involve exploring different presentations, pronouns, and labels that resonate with an individual's internal sense of gender. Respect for chosen names and pronouns is crucial in affirming the identities of non-binary and gender-fluid individuals, fostering a more inclusive and supportive environment.

Non-binary and gender-fluid people contribute to the diversity of human experience, enriching our understanding of gender and identity. By challenging societal norms and advocating for greater visibility and acceptance, they play a vital role in advancing gender equality and social justice.

It's essential to recognize that everyone's experience of gender is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all definition of what it means to be non-binary or gender-fluid. Embracing diversity and respecting individual identities is fundamental to creating a more inclusive and equitable society for all.

In conclusion, being non-binary or gender-fluid means embracing a multifaceted understanding of gender that goes beyond traditional binary frameworks. It's about affirming the complexity and diversity of human identity and creating space for everyone to express themselves authentically. As we continue to challenge outdated norms and celebrate diversity, we move closer to a world where all gender identities are recognized, respected, and celebrated.

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Genderqueer.Me

Eddie Izzard: She/Her Pronouns

"I am somewhat boyish and somewhat girlish. I identify with both, but I fancy women.”

-Eddie Izzard

Genderfluid comedy legend Eddie Izzard announced that she is now exclusively using she/her pronouns. The British 58-year-old explained, "it feels great because people assume that they just know me from before, but I’m genderfluid. I just want to be based in girl mode from now on.” Izzard has identified as transgender, genderfluid, and transvestite since at least 2016, when she said she is “somewhat boyish and somewhat girlish. I identify with both, but I fancy women.”

She has also said that she uses the term “transgender” as an “umbrella term” and has called herself “a lesbian trapped in a man’s body” several decades before she said she was genderfluid.

In 2017, she told The Hollywood Reporter, “I am essentially transgender. I have boy mode and girl mode. I do feel I have boy genetics and girl genetics.” That same year, she joked on Twitter that she does not wear women’s clothes because “they’re my clothes. I bought them.”

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Comic Eddie Izzard Now Uses She/Her Pronouns

Some Backlash Over Eddie Izzard's New Pronouns

Annette Benning on Eddie Izzard and Elliot Page

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Demi Lovato, Elliot Page, Sam Smith Identify as Non-Binary

Androgynous: Joan Jett, Miley Cyrus, Laura Jane Grace

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Dear Boys by FELIN

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Trevor Project/Daniel Radcliffe: Discussion with Trans and Nonbinary Youth

Demi Lovato, Elliot Page, Sam Smith Identify as Non-Binary
Ursula K LeGuin: On Being a Man

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Don't Give Up by Maggie Szabo

Mother's Story: Raising a Gender Nonconforming Child

Ash Hardell Video Talk: Spectrums 2

Respectful and Supportive

Non-Binary Defined

Most people (including most transgender people) are either male or female. But some people don't neatly fit into the categories of "man" or "woman," or “male” or “female.” For example, some people have a gender that blends elements of being a man or a woman, or a gender that is different than either male or female. Some people don't identify with any gender. Some people's gender changes over time.

People whose gender is not male or female use many different terms to describe themselves, with non-binary being one of the most common. Other terms include genderqueer, agender, bigender, and more. None of these terms mean exactly the same thing – but all speak to an experience of gender that is not simply male or female.

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Gender Terminology

Demi Lovato, Elliot Page, Sam Smith Identify as Non-Binary

Gender Animatic

Why Non-Binary?

Some societies (like ours) tend to recognize just two genders, male and female. The idea that there are only two genders is sometimes called a “gender binary,” because binary means “having two parts” (male and female). Therefore, “non-binary” is one term people use to describe genders that don’t fall into one of these two categories, male or female.

Basic Facts about Non-Binary People

Non-binary people are nothing new. Non-binary people aren’t confused about their gender identity or following a new fad – non-binary identities have been recognized for millennia by cultures and societies around the world.

Some, but not all, non-binary people undergo medical procedures to make their bodies more congruent with their gender identity. While not all non-binary people need medical care to live a fulfilling life, it’s critical and even life-saving for many.

Most transgender people are not non-binary. While some transgender people are non-binary, most transgender people have a gender identity that is either male or female, and should be treated like any other man or woman.

Being non-binary is not the same thing as being intersex. Intersex people have anatomy or genes that don’t fit typical definitions of male and female. Most intersex people identify as either men or women. Non-binary people are usually not intersex: they’re usually born with bodies that may fit typical definitions of male and female, but their innate gender identity is something other than male or female.

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Video Talk: Gender Queer Explained

New Survey: 25% of LGBTQ Youth Use Non-Binary Pronouns

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Congresswoman Talks About Her Gender Non-Conforming Child

How to Be Respectful and Supportive

It isn’t as hard as you might think to be supportive and respectful of non-binary people, even if you have just started to learn about them.

You don’t have to understand what it means for someone to be non-binary to respect them. Some people haven’t heard a lot about non-binary genders or have trouble understanding them, and that’s okay. But identities that some people don’t understand still deserve respect.

Use the name a person asks you to use. This is one of the most critical aspects of being respectful of a non-binary person, as the name you may have been using may not reflect their gender identity. Don’t ask someone what their old name was.

Try not to make any assumptions about people’s gender. You can’t tell if someone is non-binary simply by looking at them, just like how you can’t tell if someone is transgender just by how they look.

If you’re not sure what pronouns someone uses, ask. Different non-binary people may use different pronouns. Many non-binary people use “they” while others use “he” or “she,” and still others use other pronouns. Asking whether someone should be referred to as “he,” “she,” “they,” or another pronoun may feel awkward at first, but is one of the simplest and most important ways to show respect for someone’s identity.

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Advocate for non-binary friendly policies. It’s important for non-binary people to be able to live, dress and have their gender respected at work, at school and in public spaces.

Understand that, for many non-binary people, figuring out which bathroom to use can be challenging. For many non-binary people, using either the women’s or the men’s room might feel unsafe, because others may verbally harass them or even physically attack them. Non-binary people should be supported by being able to use the restroom that they believe they will be safest in.

Talk to non-binary people to learn more about who they are. There’s no one way to be non-binary. The best way to understand what it’s like to be non-binary is to talk with non-binary people and listen to their stories.

[Source: TransEquality, National Center for Transgender Equality, 2018]

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Gender Queer

Genderqueer is a term that is growing in usage, representing a blurring of the lines surrounding society’s rigid views of both gender identity and sexual orientation. Genderqueer people embrace a fluidity of gender expression that is not limiting. They may not identify as male or female, but as both, neither, or as a blend. Similarly, genderqueer is a more inclusive term with respect to sexual orientation. It does not limit a person to identifying strictly as heterosexual or homosexual.

Genderqueer as an adjective is a term denoting or relating to a person who does not subscribe to conventional gender distinctions but identifies with neither, both, or a combination of male and female genders.

Genderqueer as a noun is a person who does not subscribe to conventional gender distinctions but identifies with neither, both, or a combination of male and female genders.

Genderqueer, also known as non-binary, is a catch-all category for gender identities that are not exclusively masculine or feminine, ‌identities which are outside the gender binary and cisnormativity. Genderqueer people may express a combination of masculinity and femininity, or neither, in their gender expression.

Genderqueer people may identify as either having an overlap of, or indefinite lines between, gender identity;having two or more genders (bigender, trigender, pangender); having no gender (agender, nongender, genderless, genderfree, neutrois); moving between genders or having a fluctuating gender identity (genderfluid, genderblending); or being third gender or other-gender, a category which includes those who do not place a name to their gender.

Gender identity is separate from sexual or romantic orientation, and genderqueer people have a variety of sexual orientations, just as transgender and cisgender people do.

Ash Hardell Video Talk: Spectrums 1

GLAAD: Young People Explain What Non-Binary Means to Them

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In addition to being an umbrella term, genderqueer has been used as an adjective to refer to any people who transgress distinctions of gender, regardless of their self-defined gender identity, or who "queer" gender. Individuals may express gender non-normatively by not conforming into the binary gender categories of "man" and "woman". Genderqueer is often used to self-identify by people who challenge binary social constructions of gender.

The term has also been applied by those describing what they see as a gender ambiguity. Androgynous (also androgyne) is frequently used as a descriptive term for people in this category. This is because the term androgyny is closely associated with a blend of socially defined masculine and feminine traits. However, not all genderqueer persons identify as androgynous. Some genderqueer people identify as a masculine woman or a feminine man or combine genderqueer with another gender option.

Androgyny is a state in which gendered behaviors, presentations and roles include aspects of both masculinity and femininity. People of any gender identity or sexual orientation can be androgynous, but it is often favored by non-binary people as a means to externally express their gender identity. At way of expressing androgyny can include dressing in way where one is unable to tell if they are male or female. People who feel that their gender identity is androgynous often identify as androgyne.

Respectful and Supportive: Understanding Non-Binary People

Nongirly: Gutsy, Goofy, Geeky, Glorious

Animation Explanation: Beyond the Binary

GLAAD: Young People Explain What Non-Binary Means to Them

Queer People: Don't Give Up

Trans and Nonbinary People: Bodies, Desirability, Revolutionizing Beauty

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Trevor Project/Daniel Radcliffe: Discussion with Trans and Nonbinary Youth

Androgynous: Joan Jett, Miley Cyrus, Laura Jane Grace

Advice From Gender Therapist: Am I Really Genderqueer or Something Else?

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Ursula K LeGuin: On Being a Man

Trans and Nonbinary People on Bodies, Desirability, and Revolutionizing Beauty

Non-Binary Described

To be a non-binary person is (essentially) exactly what it sounds like: To identify yourself, and your gender, as existing outside of the binary definitions of man or woman, masculine or feminine. I often hear from the non-binary people I know that a definitive gender identity is something that doesn’t make sense to/for them. Identifying as genderqueer myself, I relate to the inability force to myself to exist comfortably within the social rules surrounding gender. That is why the word non-binary is so beautiful, because many identities and expressions can exist within its definition.

To be non-binary can be as simple as deciding to live one’s life as free and true to oneself as possible. But for each individual, it can mean something much more personal. For some, it involves changing pronouns, changing names, changing wardrobes, or, sometimes, changing nothing at all in order to feel like the truest version of oneself. Some non-binary people experience dysphoria and some do not. The non-binary community is diverse and each experience is different and nuanced.

When asked about my own gender, I often repeat something I’ve heard said by gender nonconforming and non-binary people: I am me-gender. I am simply myself, despite any parts I may have been born with. Who we are is often affected by how society views us, but how we identify is entirely about how we view ourselves. To exist outside strict definitions is powerful and but also vulnerable, which is why I admire non-binary people who are able to live their lives honestly. Living openly as non-binary is a statement made to society that says we can be more than what we were told to be.

[Source: Kylin Camburn, GLAAD Campus Ambassador, July 2019]

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Raising My Rainbow: Gender Nonconforming Kids

GLAAD: Young People Explain What Non-Binary Means to Them

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Gender Animatic

Trevor Project/Daniel Radcliffe: Discussion with Trans and Nonbinary Youth

Identifying as Non-Binary

Genderqueer is a term that refers to people who are non-binary. Some genderqueer people may even prefer to describe themselves as "non-binary," or "NB", or "enby." These terms represent a catch-all category for gender identities that are not exclusively masculine or feminine. Quenderqueer or non-binary identities are outside of the gender binary and cisnormativity.

Genderqueer people may identify as one or more of the following:

--having an overlap of, or indefinite lines between, gender identity
--having two or more genders (bigender, trigender, pangender)
--having no gender (agender, nongender, genderless, genderfree, neutrois)
--moving between genders or having a fluctuating gender identity (genderfluid, genderblending)
--being third gender or other-gender, a category which includes those who do not name their gender

Some genderqueer people use that as their only description of their gender identity, while others also identify as another gender identity such as androgyne or bigender. Genderqueer people may also identify as transgender and/or nonbinary. Some genderqueer people may wish to transition, either medically or by changing their name and/or pronouns to suit their preferred gender expression. Genderqueer people can have any sexual orientation.

List of Non-Binary People

Demi Lovato, Elliot Page, Sam Smith Identify as Non-Binary

"Genderqueer", along with being an umbrella term, has been used as an adjective to refer to any people who transgress mainstream distinctions of gender, regardless of their self-defined gender identity. Androgynous is sometimes also used as a descriptive term for people in this category, but genderqueer is used to indicate that gender norms can be transgressed through a combination of masculinity and femininity, or neither.

On matters of sex and sexuality, there is no avoiding discussing gender. It is important to start by defining “gender,” and distinguishing it from “biological sex.” Too often, biological sex is thought to be synonymous with the social category of gender. Although they are consistent for the majority of the population (feminine women and masculine men), sex and gender are not consistent for a sizable number of people. And, for some individuals, the typical categories of sex (female and male) and gender (feminine and masculine) simply do not fit.

Non-Binary/Agender

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Video Talk: What Does Non-Binary Mean?

What is Neutrois?

List of Non-Binary People

Ursula K LeGuin: On Being a Man

Maggie Szabo: Don't Give Up

Myths About Non-Binary People

Respectful and Supportive: Understanding Non-Binary People

Dear Boys by FELIN

Gender: The Space Between

TED Talk: Living Non-Binary in a Binary World

Wikipedia: Gender Bender

Famous Non-Binary People

Jesse James Keitel - Actor

Courtney Act - Singer
Kate Bornstein - Author
Kehlani - Musician
Asia Kate Dillon - Actor
Miley Cyrus - Musician

Halsey - Singer
Cara Delevingne - Model
Tommy Dorfman - Actor
Rain Dove - Model

Lachlin Watson - Actor
Angel Haze - Rapper

Bridgette Lundy-Pain - Actor
Eddie Izzard - Comedian
Rose McGowan - Actor

Janelle Monae - Musician

Ellie Desautels - Actor

Nico Tortorella - Actor

Misha Osherovich - Actor

Rebecca Sugar - Screenwriter

Raven Saunders - Athlete

Demi Lovato - Musician

Alok Vaid-Menon - Author

Tom Phelan - Actor

Jack Monrow - Journalist

Rhea/River Butcher - Comedian
Ruby Rose - Actor
Sam Smith - Musician

Donia Kash - Actor
Amanda Stenberg - Actor
Jonathan Van Ness - Hairdresser
Bex Taylor-Klaus - Actor
Harry Styles - Musician

Ser Anzoategui - Actor
Jacob Tobia - Writer

Liv Hewson - Actor
Indya Moore - Model

Sarah Gailey - Writer
Ezra Miller - Actor

Radam Ridwan - Writer

Sara Ramirez - Actor

Jonathan Van Ness - TV Star
Brigette Lundy-Paine - Actor
Robyn Lambird - Athlete
Quintessa Swindell - Actor
Sara Ramirez - Actor
Olly Alexander - Singer
Nico Tortorella - Actor
Leo Baker - Athlete
Amandla Stenberg - Actor
Kae Tempest - Poet
Theo Germaine - Actor

Hikaru Utada - Musician

Emma D’Arcy - Actor

Lily Gladstone - Actor

Lio Tipton - Model
Sam Smith - Musician
Daisy Eagan - Actor
Nikki Hiltz - Athlete
Mae Martin - Comedian
Asia Kate Dillon - Actor
Joey Soloway - Filmmaker
Emma Corrin - Actor
Dua Saleh - Musician
Ian Alexander - Actor
Liv Hewson - Actor

GLAAD: Young People Explain What Non-Binary Means to Them

Things You Should Know About What It Means To Be Nonbinary

Things Not to Say to a Non-Binary Person

Third Gender

Third gender or third sex is a non-binary designation in which individuals are categorized, either by themselves or by society, as neither man nor woman. It also describes a social category present in those societies that recognize three or more genders. The term third is usually understood to mean "other." Some anthropologists and sociologists have described not only third genders, but also fourth and fifth genders.

Apart from biological/anatomical sex, the state of personally identifying as, or being identified by society as, a man, a woman, or other, is usually also defined by the individual's gender identity and gender role in the particular culture in which they live. Not all cultures have strictly defined gender roles. In different cultures, a third or fourth gender may represent very different things. In Australia, the Yimpininni community refer to their trans members as Sistergirls and Brotherboys. To the Indigenous Māhū of Hawaii, it is an intermediate state between man and woman, or to be a "person of indeterminate gender". The traditional Dineh of the Southwestern US acknowledge four genders: feminine woman, masculine woman, feminine man, masculine man. The term "third gender" has also been used to describe hijras of India, Bangladesh and Pakistan (who have gained legal identity), fa'afafine of Polynesia, and sworn virgins of the Balkans.

While found in a number of non-Western cultures, concepts of "third" and "fourth" and more gender roles are still somewhat new to mainstream western culture and conceptual thought. The concept is most likely to be embraced in the modern LGBTQ or queer subcultures, or in ethnic minority cultures that exist within larger Western communities such as the North American Indigenous cultures that have roles for Two Spirit people. While mainstream western scholars, notably anthropologists who have tried to write about Native American and South Asian "gender variant" people, have often sought to understand the term "third gender" solely in the language of the modern LGBTQ community, other scholars especially Indigenous scholars, stress that their lack of cultural understanding and context has led to widespread misrepresentation of third gender people.

Info: Two Spirit
Wikipedia: Third Gender

USA Today: California Legally Recognizes Third Gender

Daily Wire: California Offers Non-Binary Option

Advocate: Lessons for Parents for Gender Nonconforming Kids

Demi Lovato, Elliot Page, Sam Smith Identify as Non-Binary

Without Gender

"Agender" is a term which can be literally translated as "without gender" or "non-gender." It can be seen either as a non-binary gender identity or as a statement of not having a gender identity. People who identify as agender may describe themselves as one or more of the following:

--Genderless or lacking gender.
--Gender neutral. This may be meant in the sense of being neither man or woman yet still having a gender.
--Neutrois or neutrally gendered.
--Having an unknown or undefinable gender; not aligning with any gender.
--Having no other words that fit their gender identity.
--Not knowing or not caring about gender, as an internal identity and/or as an external label.
--Deciding not to label their gender.
--Identifying more as a person than any gender at all.

Many agender people also identify as genderqueer, non-binary and/or transgender. However, some agender people prefer to avoid these terms, especially transgender, as they feel this implies identifying as a gender other than their assigned gender, while they in fact do not identify as any gender at all.

Agender people can have any preference for pronouns, although some prefer to avoid using gendered language about themselves as much as possible. They can also present in any way - masculine, feminine, both or neither. Agender people can experience dysphoria if they are unable to express their identity in a way they are comfortable with.

Agender people who wish to appear gender-neutral or genderless may have gender nullification surgery to achieve a body that lacks sex characteristics. Chromosome therapy is currently being studied by researchers at UC Berkeley which attempts to nullify those chromosomes which stereotypically identify the individual by a sex.

Advice From Gender Therapist: Am I Really Genderqueer or Something Else?

Genderqueer.Me

TED Talk: Living Non-Binary in a Binary World

Rain Dove: Playing With Gender

BuzzFeed: Stunningly Beautiful Androgynous Models

Wikipedia: Metrosexual

Maggie Szabo: Don't Give Up

Rain Dove: Playing With Gender

Agender people can be of any sexuality and should not be confused with being asexual.

Agender is also called genderblank, genderfree, genderless, gendervoid, non-gendered, or null gender. Agender is an identity under the nonbinary and transgender umbrella terms. Agender individuals find that they have no gender identity, although some define this more as having a gender identity that is neutral.

Some agender people feel that they have no gender identity, while others feel that agender is itself a gender identity. This is similar to and overlaps with the experience of being gender neutral or having a neutral gender identity.

As some agender people have no gender identity, it is important to not talk about nonbinary or transgender people's experiences only in the sense of gender identity.

What is Neutrois? Neutrois is a non-binary gender identity that falls under the genderqueer or transgender umbrellas. There is no one definition of Neutrois, since each person that self-identifies as such experiences their gender differently. The most common ones are: Neutral-gender, Null-gender, Neither male nor female, Genderless, Agender.

It is often said that non-gender or genderlessness is the experience of having no gender identity at all, whereas gender neutral or neutrois is the experience of having a gender identity, a gender identity which is not male or female, but neutral. However, these statements don't match the experiences of everyone who has taken up these identities as their own. This is a problem of a difference between word definitions that are prescriptivist (telling everyone how they should use a word, and saying that many people use it wrong) and descriptivist (describing how people have actually been using a word, without telling them to change).

Non-Binary/Agender

List of Non-Binary People

Genderqueer.Me

Myths About Non-Binary People

Gender: The Space Between

Wikipedia: Gender Bender

Non-Binary Documentary: They/Them

Neutrois

Neutrois is a term used to describe persons with a null or neutral gender (being neither male nor female), and in some cases, a person who may also seek to reduce signs of their physical sex. The exact definition of neutrois may differ depending on the source. Neutrois is understood as a non-binary gender that can fall under the genderqueer and/or transgender umbrellas, though a neutrois person may identify themselves as agender or genderless rather than neutrois.

Neutrois is not androgyne, it’s quite the opposite. Androgyny is a combination of female and male characteristics, while neutrois is an elimination of them.

Neutrois are agender or neutral-gender. They usually experience a sense of gender dysphoria, one that doesn’t correctly reflect their internal gender.

Neutrois is not genderless. While the prefix a- in agender may hint at a “lack of,” neutrois is not necessarily a lack of gender. Just like a neutral color does not mean colorless, or a neutral opinion does not mean without opinion, a neutral gender does mean without gender. Neutrois do have an internal gender, it just happens to be neither male, nor female. It’s neutral.

Ash and Ari: Non-Binary vs Androgyny

Don't Give Up by Maggie Szabo

Mother's Story: Raising a Gender Nonconforming Child

Congresswoman Talks About Her Gender Non-Conforming Child

Androgynous: Joan Jett, Miley Cyrus, Laura Jane Grace

What is Female Masculinity?

GLAAD: Young People Explain What Non-Binary Means to Them

Rain Dove: Gender Capitalism

Gender Bending

According to Wikipedia, a gender bender is one who genderfucks or "queers" gender. A gender bender is a person who disrupts, "bends," "messes with," or "fucks with" expected gender roles. Gender bending (and gender blending) is sometimes a form of social activism undertaken to destroy rigid gender roles and defy sex-role stereotypes, notably in cases where the gender-nonconforming person finds these roles oppressive. The term "gender critical" has been used. It can be a reaction to, and protest of, homophobia, transphobia or misogyny.

Some gender benders identify with the sex assigned them at birth, but challenge the societal norms that assign expectations of particular, gendered behavior to that sex. This rebellion can involve androgynous dress, adornment, behavior, and atypical gender roles. Gender benders may self-identify as trans or genderqueer. However, many trans people do not consider themselves "gender benders."

As reported in Daily Gazette (2012), "genderfuck" is a term used to describe "a person's gender identity or the act of consciously and conspicuously challenging traditional ideas of the gender binary through androgyny, hyperbole, and cross-dressing."

The Urban Dictionary defines "genderfuck" as deliberately sending mixed messages about one's sex, usually through one's dress (wearing a skirt and a beard). It is based upon the belief/idea that either gender does not exist (but only in the context of culture) or that there are multiple genders (beyond male and female), including but not limited to transgender.

Trevor Project/Daniel Radcliffe: Discussion with Trans and Nonbinary Youth

Girl in the Kinks Shirt by Matt Nathanson

Things Not to Say to a Non-Binary Person

Atypical Gender Roles

An atypical gender role is a gender role comprising gender-typed behaviors not typically associated with a cultural norm. Gender role stereotypes are the socially determined model which contains the cultural beliefs about what the gender roles should be. It is what a society expects men and women to think, look like, and behave. Gender role stereotypes are often based on gender norms. Examples of some atypical gender roles:

Househusbands - Men who stay at home and take care of the house and children while their partner goes to work. According to Sam Roberts of the New York Times, in 1970 four percent of American men earned less than their wives. National Public Radio reported that by 2015 this had risen to 38%.

Metrosexual - A man of any sexual orientation who has interest in style and fashion; typically well dressed and meticulously groomed.

Androgyne - An androgynous person, identifying as neither male nor female; Or presenting a gender either mixed or neutral.

Crossdresser - A person who dresses in the clothing and approximating the appearance of members of the opposite gender, in public or solely in private, without proclaiming themselves to be that gender. Cross dressers may be cisgender, or they may be trans people who have not yet transitioned.

Animation Explanation: Beyond the Binary

Androgynous: Joan Jett, Miley Cyrus, Laura Jane Grace

CBS News: Gender/The Space Between

Hijra - In India, a (sometimes neutered) person whose anatomy is in most cases identified as male (more rarely female or intersex), but whose gender identity is neither masculine nor feminine, whose gender role includes special clothing that identifies them as a hijra, and whose gender role includes a special place in society and special occupations.

Khanith - In Arab countries, the gynecomimetic partner in a heterogender homosexual relationship, who may retain his public status as a man, despite his departure in dress and behavior from a socio-normal male role. The clothing of these individuals must be intermediate between that of a male and a female. His social role includes the freedom to associate with women in the entire range of their social interactions, including singing with them at a wedding.

Muxe - (Pronounced “moo-shay") In Zapotec communities of southern Mexico, is describes a person registered as male at birth who identifies with or presents a feminine gender expression, typically through behaviors, occupations, modes of dress that are culturally associated with femininity.

Bakla - This word is borrowed from Tagalog and is a sometimes derogatory, potentially offensive word in Philippine English. It is a person registered as male at birth who identifies with or presents a feminine gender expression, typically through behaviors, occupations, modes of dress, that are culturally associated with femininity. Bakla encompasses a wide range of gendered characteristics and practices that do not correspond to heteronormative ideas of masculinity. It can often, but not always, denote homosexuality, although the term is increasingly being used as a synonym for Western terms relating to sexual orientation, such as gay and homosexual.

Wikipedia: Androgyny

Trevor Project/Daniel Radcliffe: Discussion with Trans and Nonbinary Youth

Cory Booker's Non-Binary "Niephew"

Different: Joan Jett and Miley Cyrus